Wow there is a lot going on. I would love to know if you are a teenager or are you an adult. In either case I feel that you should definitely seek some type of counseling. This will help you whatever the situation is.
As far as your mom, she obviously has her own things going on emotionally that have nothing to do with you. Our parents come with their own baggage into our lives and we can’t take responsibility for it, nor can we fix it for them. They have to want to get the help and find out what their reasons are for doing the things they do.
Her treatment of you is not okay. There should be more sensitivity and respect there. Go to counseling and work on yourself, and you can suggest to your mom to do the same thing but you can’t force anyone to do anything. The only person you can fix is yourself. I would like to suggest that if you can make your own appointments and scheduling , that you do it yourself for now, until things get a little better.
You have to build up your self esteem, and become more confident, and you you will start to see a more positive change. Take it one day at a time.